The Movie: No Dead Heroes (1986)
The Perp: Harry Cotter (John Dresden)
The Victims: The Cotter Family

Yes, and it doesn't get much worse than this. No Dead Heroes was a bargain basement Filipino cheapie produced during the height of the Cold War Era. Its plot, such as it was, involved an US Army lieutenant kidnapped by the KGB, implanted with a mind-controlling microchip and set forth on a mission to assassinate the Pope.

In this charming scene, KGB officer Ivan has sent Lieutenant Harry on a little test run. Now this 'test run,' a product of the deviant and twisted Soviet hive-mind, involves having the hapless drone wipe out his whole family. Oh, those Reds!

The film is rife with horrendous dubbing and even worse acting. Just witness, these people can't even die convincingly...

Welcome to the Actioneer's latest and greatest feature: Bad FX Spotlite - a special showcase for those visual effects masters whose special achievements weren't quite recognized by the Academy. There's always next year, fellas. Until then you'll have to settle for the Spotlite.

Evan Lurie is a man of many talents, first and foremost his utilization of the "Chinese Balls Technique" for wooing women (watch out, Derek Evans!). As highlighted in the film Hologram Man (1995), he can also transform into an awkward, paunchy wax figurine that bears only a passing resemblance to him. How he utilizes this in the bedding of the fairer sex, remains to be seen. Conversation starter perhaps? Well, a better one than, "Have you ever seen the movie Poltergeist?"